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Buy in

Posted On: 02-27-2012

A few years ago Notre Dame beat Michigan.  My son is a Notre Dame grad and we are Irish football fans.  The teem had been struggling so victories were valuable.  This particular win was against a sub-par Michigan team.   The Wolverines had a new coach and they were struggling.   Nonetheless, Notre Dame had a victory.

My son called after the win,  “Dad, we’re back!”

“Troy,” I said, “Did you watch the game?  Michigan turned it over three times in the first quarter and Notre Dame couldn’t take advantage.  Notre Dame was kicking field goals when they should have been scoring touchdowns from close range.   Notre Dame  didn’t put on a very good display against a pretty bad opponent.”

“Dad,” came the reply from the phone.  “Don’t be negative, you gotta be a fan.”

That’s what he said.  What he meant was — are you in or are you on the sidelines?  Real fans buy in!

It made me think about commitment.  There are things I am really committed to in life and those commitments show up in everything I think and do.  As I look back at my past I can see where I was truly committed, and I see where I was partly committed, and I can see where I merely went through the motions, when I was on the sidelines.  It made a difference in the results.

Today I know what I believe and that belief guides my commitment in all parts of life;  faith, family and profession.

At a breakfast with a new friend this morning I shared  that self-belief, self-trust, makes life easier.  It becomes easier  because you know what to ‘jump into’ … what to ‘just do’ … what to commit to … and what to buy into.

A path to Communication success

Posted On: 02-20-2012

At a recent presentation skills workshop I was asked about speaking impromptu.  The question  is often asked because we are often called on to share ideas at work, during a conference call,  at committee meetings or at friends gatherings.   We are often asked to speak ‘off the cuff.’  It would be much easier if we had a formula, or a path to follow.

Well here’s a path to follow.  Here’s the simple formula to plug in  — past, present, future. Just use that formula and insert the subject matter.

Here’s an example.  Let’s use gasoline price as the subject and put it  into the formula and see what happens.  Here we go.

“In the past, gas was only a dollar a gallon .  I didn’t think about it much and it did not have much of an effect on what kind of car I bought.  Today, (present) gas prices are hovering around four bucks a gallon and the high cost causes me to curtail trips around the city and it has me thinking of what kind of car to buy.  I’m not sure where the prices are going in the future, but I am sure that we will continue to see smaller cars on the road and drivers thinking more economically about the trips they take as the cost of gasoline becomes a bigger share of the budget.”

The formula gives us a path to follow and that is key element of  communication.  We know where we are going!   When we know where we are going during our conversation or presentation we become more comfortable …  and comfort shows to the audience.  That comfort helps us become more relaxed and in control.

Use the formula next time you are at a loss for words …. it will put you on the right path!

The Truth

Posted On: 01-08-2012

Here’s the truth!  People want to feel good about themselves.   I know you know that.  But keep it in mind as I continue with some thoughts on how we make presentations and in our general communication. Since we now both know the truth (that people want to feel good about themselves) I am going to operate within that understanding.  My goal when I communicate with others will be to help them feel good about themselves.   Not to give them information, not to tell them how to run their lives, not to tell them what to do.  My goal with everything I say will be to help them feel good about themselves. This may sound very simple to you but many, and I am sure you know some, do not care how others feel. So, what benefit is it to me to help people feel better about themselves?  Well,  if I help them feel better about themselves they will listen to me.  You would wouldn’t you?  And if I help individuals feel better about themselves they might follow my lead, because they like what they hear, and see.  And if they follow my lead, then I may be able to influence them to a certain way of thinking, convince them of an idea or plan of action.  If that happens I have become a leader. In the past, when I stood in front of an audience, I wanted to be the smartest person in the room.  I’ve changed my thinking.  I now want the audience members to become the smartest people in the room, and I want them to get their information from me.  I want them to feel better about themselves because of interaction with me.  I want to influence them to think better of themselves. It’s a different way of thinking about communicating.  Help others want to listen to you.  There are skills and processes to make that happen, but first we need to buy into the idea. I worked with a gentleman, let’s call him Jim, who wanted to improve his communication skills.  Well let me change that.  He wanted to “stick it to his boss!”  Yeah, that’s what he said.  His boss said Jim appeared threatened and awkward whenever they talked.   His boss said that Jim needed to improve how he communicated so Jim wanted to “stick it to him.” I told Jim I couldn’t help him reach his goal of “sticking it to his boss.”  But I did offer that I could help him become a better presenter and communicator if that was his goal.  I suggested his goal was misdirected. Let’s back up for a moment.  If Jim’s goal was to “stick it to his boss”, he would never be able to help his boss feel better about himself, and remember that’s the communication goal I’m trying to sell. So, what I suggested for Jim to do is try and communicate so that his boss would feel better about himself.  Each time they talked, attempt to help his boss reach a goal, convey a point, or try to learn something different about his boss.  What happened is that Jim brought something new to the communication.  A new way of thinking, of influencing , of taking control of the communication.   And a side note, Jim started liking himself more because he was more positive in his communication. So I guess the real truth is, when we bring our best attitude to life in our communication, it will also help others with their attitude in life, and communication.  That’s the TRUTH! I’ll post some of the simple communication processes in the upcoming weeks.

Start in the middle!

Posted On: 11-28-2011

In my broadcasting years it was called, bury the lead, and I was guilty of it more than once.  The most important part of the story was written in the second or third paragraph.   Sometime I thought it needed a set up, other time I was concerned it had to be told chronologically.  No matter the reason the most important part of the story was ‘buried,” not intentionally but it happened.

The same happens in speeches.  The presenter, you or me, think we have to start at the beginning.  Eventually we get to the most important part … the part that we came to tell them … later in the speech.

Here’s a different way of speech writing or speech thinking.  Bring the middle to the front, or start in the middle.  Start with the part that is going to WOW the audience, start with the part that always works!  But Gary, you might say,  we have to give them the background.  Right!  Of course you do!  But I bet you can write around that with a simple phrase like…”let me back up to the beginning,” or” let me share how we arrived at that magical moment.”

I recently watched a video of a very influential person giving a presentation.  He has written three best selling books, has a wealth of knowledge and stories  and commands attention when he speaks.  But while I was watching him he was moving nervously, not sure of what he was saying, he looked at the floor, head down and filling space with ums and ahs!  He was horribly uncomfortable.

After about 7 minutes of this he got into the meat of his presentation.  The Ahs and Ums disappeared.  He stopped moving nervously and stood with a strong foundation.  He looked at the audience while telling his powerful stories.  No longer was I thinking this guy is nervous or uncomfortable.  I was listing to the stories he was sharing, no he was re-living!  He was a powerful presenter because he was sharing the part of the presentation where he was comfortable.   I thought out loud while watching “OH YEAH!”  He had buried the lead.

Well, not actually but it’s a similar concept.  As presenters we should start with something that allows us to be most comfortable.  Move your best stuff up to the top.  Start with the stuff you used to put in the middle.  You will start more comfortably and the audience will feed off your lead.  They feel comfortable.

Try it sometime.  either in a formal presentation or a casual conversation.  When telling that story that is funny or feeling, try to start with the most important part or the most important line.  It will get the attention of your audience and they will eagerly listen for more.  Start in the middle!

Presentation Technique

Posted On: 05-08-2011

I ask audiences and speech classes I teach ” What is most important, the performance, the audience or the message?”

Hardly anyone answers the performance.  However when they do, they argue that the performance has a great deal of influence on how the audience receives the message.  Hard to argue with that reasoning.

Many, in fact most, will answer the audience.  It’s all about them isn’t it.  The audience is the reason you are presenting.

I think it’s all about the message.

I won’t let the audience or the class answer out loud anymore.  No show of hands to vote which is more important.  I don’t want them to think they shared a wrong answer so I ask them just to think about it.  Don’t respond for now.

If you think the presentation, or performance, is most important you get caught up in yourself and how you are doing in addressing the audience.  Many speakers think different, but it’s not about the speaker.

So how can I suggest the audience is not most important?  We wouldn’t be here if not for the audience.  They need the message, especially if it’s an important lesson or special truth they need to hear or understand.  Right?

I’m going to stick with the message being most important and the focal point of the presentation.  It’s all about the belief in the message being delivered.  If we truly believe in the message it will show with our performance.  We will live the message as much as we do present it.  In fact if we continually live the message, that will be our performance.

And if we believe in that message it will come across to the audience.  They will see the truth we believe.  It will show.  Passion and excitement will be the pathway of the words we share from the front of the room.  There is nothing we can do to better  value our audience than to commit to our message so that it is understood through our actions as well as our words.

When we focus on our message we better value our audience.  They will experience  the passion and excitement of our actions which are naturally created by our beliefs.

However, we can tune up our performance.

I want to continue working.   Message yes, but we can continue practicing how to live it in front of others.

Military Basics

Posted On: 03-22-2011

Spoke to the military a couple of weeks back.  I was the keynote presenter at the Kentucky National Guard Airman/Solider of the Year award.

I was a member of the Kentucky Air National Guard way back when.  In fact I was activated for 20 months of consecutive duty so I am classified as a veteran,  but I don’t wear the uniform anymore.  So it was eye opening to step back into the world of the military and share a message with the women and men who serve our country.  Serve is the key word and they understand the meaning of the word.  It’s about the basics.

Yes, the military follow procedures.  They are committed to the process as well as the outcome but they also understand it’s all about the people.  We sometime lose focus that the military is made up of people.  People who leave their families because they are committed to a bigger family.  People who grow lonely when they wake up in a place  far away from the people they love.  People who endure hardships to protect ideals and issues to which they are deeply committed.  That’s the key word, COMMITTED.  They choose to commit to a cause, issue, an ideal, and they stay with it.  It takes on a sort of reverence.  It’s more than words, it a way of life.  They live out their commitment through their actions.   It shows in the way they gather, the way they speak, the way they interact.  It becomes their procedure.

I showed up to thank them for their commitment and to encourage them to be resilient.  Sometimes it’s a challenge to stay committed to the important things …. God, Family, Self.  I thought I was there to motivate them.  But as often happens when we pay attention, we learn by listening.  I was encouraged and empowered to stay resilient in the basics … commitment to God, Family, and Self.   They didn’t say it, they showed it.   The basics!

The Basics

Posted On: 03-05-2011

I just returned form a speaking engagement in Las Vegas.  I shared the ‘I CAN PLAY’ attitude with owners, leaders, and soon to be owners and leaders in the Pizza industry.

To tell the truth, sometimes I think the message is just too simple.  BELIEVE IN YOURSELF — TRUST YOURSELF… it’s the first step to success!  See what I mean.  You just read it and thought “Well of course, who doesn’t know that?”

Evidently a lot of people.  They just don’t get the basics.  They are looking for something with a little more pop, they want an idea that’s new.  Something they haven’t heard of yet.  They’ve heard this vision, positive atmosphere, and risk before …. got anything new?

Nope.  Just the basics.  I talked with individuals who got excited about the basics this week.  They heard the message in a different way.  They were influenced by the message.  They got it…. it was powerful!

Just received an email from a gentleman in Wisconsin.  Said he had put his dream away.  Decided that the corporate way was the best way.  But then he got the message at the Pizza Expo.  The basic message.  BELIEVE IN YOURSELF…. TRUST YOURSELF …. it’s the first step to success!  He got excited.  He’s getting uncomfortable.  He’s getting his dream out of mothballs.  He’s beginning to see himself opening his own pizza shop!  He can probably see friends coming through the door, feel the heat of the ovens, smell the garlic and see the joy he creates in his customers.

What changed!   He got back to the basics …. vision, positive atmosphere, risk …. the simple things that make an ‘I CAN PLAY’ attitude.  The basics that get us to trust and begin living successfully instead of looking for success!

Farmers National Company

Posted On: 10-25-2010

I Can Play presentation with Farmers National Company – Oct 25,2010

TEAMERSHIP – It’s like leadership but with the team in front!

  1. Focus on the Goal!
  2. Take Ownership!
  3. Create a Cooperative Environment!

Things we can bring to the team …. minus, division,addition, or multiply.  We want to multiply our team and each member.

Make it #3 — Create a SUCCESS Environment!

 

LEADERSHIP – When someone feels better about who they are because they were around you!

I CAN PLAY attitude

1.  VISION

Make it real.

Live it each day.

Share it with others.  

2.  POSITIVE ATMOSPHERE

Positive self-talk.

Positive people/places.

Focus on results.

3.  RISK

Face the negatives.

Expand boundaries.

Practice the difficult.

You are powerful

Posted On: 10-02-2010

You are powerful!  You really are.  No telling what you can accomplish!

Visited Hammond Indiana yesterday and spoke to some wonderful individuals (mostly women) who help other people.  They work with children and families in Early Childhood development.  Their goal is to convince others they can be better than they think they can be.  They don’t always think about it that way but that’s what they are doing;  teaching people (kids & families) to grow … to have vision, to live in a positive atmosphere and to take risk and stretch.   Sounds like living life with an I CAN PLAY attitude.  That’s why I was there.

While preparing the room for the presentation I met a young man who was with security for the University where the conference was held.  He said he worked part time while going to school.  He was studying finanace.  I asked what he was going to do after college.  “Finance” was his answer.

“What company?” I asked.  Said he didn’t know.  “What will you be doing in finance?” I asked again.  Said he didn’t know.  “What will it look like when you do what you do?”  Said he didn’t know … but you could see he was thinking

I suggested he start to answer those questions and begin to see where he was going and also begin to see how it’s going to happen.  He was listening.  You can tell when people are listening.  Then I asked again, “Can you see yourself across the desk with someone asking for your help, maybe trying to buy a house?”  He nodded.  He could not only see himself there he could feel the future!

We finished our conversation.  He was aglow!  He could see success.  That’s vision!

As I continued preparing the room I thought …that’s powerful.  He could see the future as he creates it.  He’s powerful.  We all are!

Word list

Posted On: 07-21-2010

For the next few weeks I am going to list words that move me.  Perhaps they move you also.   “Move me?” you might say!

I mean move you mentally.  Cause you to take steps.  Make you do something different, improve yourself.

My favorite word is ADJUST.   “Now how can that move you?” is the question.   Adjust is a synonym for the word change.  I don’t like change, or at least the word.  Change sounds harsh, abrupt.  I would rather adjust.   Let the world change … I’ll just adjust.  It sound so much simpler.

Adjust is the way we learn and the way we deal with life.  We adjust our thinking about something and we learn more.  We open our minds (adjust) and we put in more knowledge.  When we try one way, and it doesn’t work, we adjust, try a new path. It really is that simple.  But we must be able, capable and eager to adjust.  That’s the hard part.  Looking for and being ready to adjust.

Somebody (I have looked it up but have not found who) said something like this.  If you want to go somewhere you’ve never been …  you have to do something you’ve never done.

That’s the long way of saying ….”ADJUST.”