Self-belief/trust – Page 3

What to bring for the presentation!

Posted On: 05-01-2012

Shared the I CAN PLAY message with Breckenridge County football team and their boosters Saturday night. The formula is Vision, Positive Atmosphere and Risk. Put them together and you get strong in your self-belief and that belief is the first step to success.

Something else happens when you begin to live the I CAN PLAY attitude. The energy level increases … and then excitement shows up and enthusiasm catches on.

Here’s how it happens, I bet you will agree. When we bring energy with us it causes us, and others, to get excited. It just happens. Bring energy to a meeting, to a family reunion, to a football practice, to a classroom, to a one-on-one conversation, it bring the level of activity up. That activity promotes excitement. People begin to think of the possibilities, the opportunities. That lends itself to creating enthusiasm. Individuals step up, open up to new ideas. They share their beliefs, see possibilities, individuals focus on the goal and formulate the path to success.

Sounds exciting doesn’t it! It is what happens when we bring energy to the conversation, the presentation, the game, the relationship, the new directive. Every time? Perhaps. Give it a try. Make the energy rise when you show up. Think YES and say YES. Positive people see success negative people see obstacles.

I started the Breckenridge County presentation with a story of coaching 7 year olds and teaching them how to hit the ball. I suggested to the kids parents they create games in the backyard using a broomstick and plastic balls the size of a golf ball. Create some fun in the back yard while teaching them to hit. The kids learn eye hand coordination and the parents are building a relationship! It also creates energy that helps a coach build a baseball team. If they can hit a plastic ball the size of a golf ball they can hit a baseball with a bat!

But the energy is the most important creation. You can build excitment and enthusiasm off the energy … and the three e’s go a long way in building a team, a relationship and a life.

As I told the story at Breck County I was hitting plastic golf balls with a broom stick. The balls were flying in the air over and into the audience. It’s all about energy. The same energy they want to create for the football team and the boosters.

Bring energy to everything you do and all your presentations … in front of an audience of 50 or an audience of one. Energy creates excitement. Excitement gets people listening.

Questions shared with Precious Blood

Posted On: 03-15-2012

Just returned from a Mission with Precious Blood Parish in Owensboro, KY. I met and prayed with some wonderful people who are letting their Light shine in the Parish and beyond!

We discussed a couple of communication processes using questions … asking others, but more importantly asking ourselves. Here are some of the questions and ideas we explored during the three day Mission.

Who am I? This digs to our very core. Who am I? What a question! But instead of just ignoring the question start writing down answers. Explore yourself, the deeper you explore the more you will understand. And if you don’t like some of the answers…adjust!

What do I believe? If you were required to stand on a roof top and shout out what you believe , for everyone to hear–What would you say? Similar to what does your sign say or what is your message. What do you believe?

What are my values? This one is similar to what do I believe but with a twist. What values to you adhere to. Truth, is that important? Honesty, commitment, service to others… what values drive you to be who you are. Write them down so you know who you are and what you are committed to.

What are my talents? This a little easier but still difficult to address. The best way to discover talents is to use your talents. List your talents — it helps define who you are.

What am I doing with my talents? Do I give my talents away, that is, do I use them. The only way they come alive is to put them to action. If you are an artist but haven’t put a brush on a canvas, you aren’t using your talents. If you are a great communicator but don’t greet people, or look them in the eye when you speak, you aren’t doing much with your talent. Use you talents, all of them, use them often, and you will discover there’s more in there. Keep looking!

What holds me back? Let’s face it you are a unique individual, unique talents, skills but sometimes things hold you back from being the best you can be. Explore what holds you back. Name it, tame it and move forward … get past the obstacle. You first have to identify what holds you back.

Questions are wonderful tools to use for growth. Grow yourself, grow your family, your church, and your workplace.

Here is the Gary Montgomery process when using questions with others … Q-L-C.

Of course the Q stand for quetions. Open conversation with others with questions about them.

The L stands for Listen and for Learn. And learning about others is most important. Listening is the process we use to Learn about others. Pay close attention about them because the more we learn about others, the deeper we can go in building a relationship.

The C stands for Contribute. Once we learn what individuals like and dis-like we can Contribute to them and help them grow by feeling better about themselves. When they feel better about who they are, because they were around and with us, well that’s leadership. They will want to be around you, listen to you and be influenced by you more and more because you help them feel better about who they are. That’s the process … how to use questions to help others grow.

At the three-day Mission we focused on using the questions in our life to grow, to discover the Light, to become the Light, and then to give the Light of Christ away.

Be specific and go deep when questioning yourself. You can take it because you want to be the best you can be.

Be gentle when using the question technique with others. They don’t yet know how good they can be. They need you to guide them.

The friendly people at Precious Blood were an inspiration for me to continue questioning and working to grow and share the Light! Thanks for the kindness and hospitality!

Coaching is discovering

Posted On: 03-09-2012

After a few years coaching kids in baseball I realized I had it all wrong. Coaching has little to do with telling or showing. It is all about discovery … discovering ways for players to get rid of the obstacle, which keeps them from being the best they can be. It is also true when teaching communication skills, leadership, personal development, or success training. Great coaches help individuals and teams get past their barriers.

When I coached baseball I learned that many kids were afraid of the ball. Trying to tell them how to catch a fly ball was useless. They were focused on not getting hurt. Catching the fly ball was not a priority. After I discovered the obstacle I needed an action step to get rid of the fear.

I showed up with tennis balls. Not just because the ball is softer, it is, but because tennis balls bounce. So I sent my team to the outfield with the instruction to catch the ball on first bounce. Here’s what happened. They were less afraid of getting hit in the head with a bouncing tennis ball so they were able to focus on the instructions, the process of learning how to catch; proper footwork, glove technique, stay in front of the ball. These are all skills that will lead to catching a fly ball, and the players, the kids, were learning without the fear of getting hit in the head. Teaching how to catch a fly ball was now simple.

You can read instructions out of a book. How to be a leader, how to give a presentation, how to find success, or how to catch a fly ball, but telling, showing, or reading will not move you beyond your obstacles. Perhaps a coach is required, someone who is not concerned about telling or showing, but more concerned about what holds you back, that’s discovery. Once the obstacle is discovered we can name it, tame it, and move on.

By the way, sometimes, even after the tennis ball process, some kids did take a ball on the head. Then we brought out the catcher’s mask … and continued the process.

Buy in

Posted On: 02-27-2012

A few years ago Notre Dame beat Michigan. My son is a Notre Dame grad and we are Irish football fans. The teem had been struggling so victories were valuable. This particular win was against a sub-par Michigan team. The Wolverines had a new coach and they were struggling. Nonetheless, Notre Dame had a victory.

My son called after the win, “Dad, we’re back!”

“Troy,” I said, “Did you watch the game? Michigan turned it over three times in the first quarter and Notre Dame couldn’t take advantage. Notre Dame was kicking field goals when they should have been scoring touchdowns from close range. Notre Dame didn’t put on a very good display against a pretty bad opponent.”

“Dad,” came the reply from the phone. “Don’t be negative, you gotta be a fan.”

That’s what he said. What he meant was — are you in or are you on the sidelines? Real fans buy in!

It made me think about commitment. There are things I am really committed to in life and those commitments show up in everything I think and do. As I look back at my past I can see where I was truly committed, and I see where I was partly committed, and I can see where I merely went through the motions, when I was on the sidelines. It made a difference in the results.

Today I know what I believe and that belief guides my commitment in all parts of life; faith, family and profession.

At a breakfast with a new friend this morning I shared that self-belief, self-trust, makes life easier. It becomes easier because you know what to ‘jump into’ … what to ‘just do’ … what to commit to … and what to buy into.

A path to Communication success

Posted On: 02-20-2012

At a recent presentation skills workshop I was asked about speaking impromptu. The question is often asked because we are often called on to share ideas at work, during a conference call, at committee meetings or at friends gatherings. We are often asked to speak ‘off the cuff.’ It would be much easier if we had a formula, or a path to follow.

Well here’s a path to follow. Here’s the simple formula to plug in — past, present, future. Just use that formula and insert the subject matter.

Here’s an example. Let’s use gasoline price as the subject and put it into the formula and see what happens. Here we go.

“In the past, gas was only a dollar a gallon . I didn’t think about it much and it did not have much of an effect on what kind of car I bought. Today, (present) gas prices are hovering around four bucks a gallon and the high cost causes me to curtail trips around the city and it has me thinking of what kind of car to buy. I’m not sure where the prices are going in the future, but I am sure that we will continue to see smaller cars on the road and drivers thinking more economically about the trips they take as the cost of gasoline becomes a bigger share of the budget.”

The formula gives us a path to follow and that is key element of communication. We know where we are going! When we know where we are going during our conversation or presentation we become more comfortable … and comfort shows to the audience. That comfort helps us become more relaxed and in control.

Use the formula next time you are at a loss for words …. it will put you on the right path!

The Truth

Posted On: 01-08-2012

Here’s the truth! People want to feel good about themselves. I know you know that. But keep it in mind as I continue with some thoughts on how we make presentations and in our general communication. Since we now both know the truth (that people want to feel good about themselves) I am going to operate within that understanding. My goal when I communicate with others will be to help them feel good about themselves. Not to give them information, not to tell them how to run their lives, not to tell them what to do. My goal with everything I say will be to help them feel good about themselves. This may sound very simple to you but many, and I am sure you know some, do not care how others feel. So, what benefit is it to me to help people feel better about themselves? Well, if I help them feel better about themselves they will listen to me. You would wouldn’t you? And if I help individuals feel better about themselves they might follow my lead, because they like what they hear, and see. And if they follow my lead, then I may be able to influence them to a certain way of thinking, convince them of an idea or plan of action. If that happens I have become a leader. In the past, when I stood in front of an audience, I wanted to be the smartest person in the room. I’ve changed my thinking. I now want the audience members to become the smartest people in the room, and I want them to get their information from me. I want them to feel better about themselves because of interaction with me. I want to influence them to think better of themselves. It’s a different way of thinking about communicating. Help others want to listen to you. There are skills and processes to make that happen, but first we need to buy into the idea. I worked with a gentleman, let’s call him Jim, who wanted to improve his communication skills. Well let me change that. He wanted to “stick it to his boss!” Yeah, that’s what he said. His boss said Jim appeared threatened and awkward whenever they talked. His boss said that Jim needed to improve how he communicated so Jim wanted to “stick it to him.” I told Jim I couldn’t help him reach his goal of “sticking it to his boss.” But I did offer that I could help him become a better presenter and communicator if that was his goal. I suggested his goal was misdirected. Let’s back up for a moment. If Jim’s goal was to “stick it to his boss”, he would never be able to help his boss feel better about himself, and remember that’s the communication goal I’m trying to sell. So, what I suggested for Jim to do is try and communicate so that his boss would feel better about himself. Each time they talked, attempt to help his boss reach a goal, convey a point, or try to learn something different about his boss. What happened is that Jim brought something new to the communication. A new way of thinking, of influencing , of taking control of the communication. And a side note, Jim started liking himself more because he was more positive in his communication. So I guess the real truth is, when we bring our best attitude to life in our communication, it will also help others with their attitude in life, and communication. That’s the TRUTH! I’ll post some of the simple communication processes in the upcoming weeks.

Start in the middle!

Posted On: 11-28-2011

In my broadcasting years it was called, bury the lead, and I was guilty of it more than once. The most important part of the story was written in the second or third paragraph. Sometime I thought it needed a set up, other time I was concerned it had to be told chronologically. No matter the reason the most important part of the story was ‘buried,” not intentionally but it happened.

The same happens in speeches. The presenter, you or me, think we have to start at the beginning. Eventually we get to the most important part … the part that we came to tell them … later in the speech.

Here’s a different way of speech writing or speech thinking. Bring the middle to the front, or start in the middle. Start with the part that is going to WOW the audience, start with the part that always works! But Gary, you might say, we have to give them the background. Right! Of course you do! But I bet you can write around that with a simple phrase like…”let me back up to the beginning,” or” let me share how we arrived at that magical moment.”

I recently watched a video of a very influential person giving a presentation. He has written three best selling books, has a wealth of knowledge and stories and commands attention when he speaks. But while I was watching him he was moving nervously, not sure of what he was saying, he looked at the floor, head down and filling space with ums and ahs! He was horribly uncomfortable.

After about 7 minutes of this he got into the meat of his presentation. The Ahs and Ums disappeared. He stopped moving nervously and stood with a strong foundation. He looked at the audience while telling his powerful stories. No longer was I thinking this guy is nervous or uncomfortable. I was listing to the stories he was sharing, no he was re-living! He was a powerful presenter because he was sharing the part of the presentation where he was comfortable. I thought out loud while watching “OH YEAH!” He had buried the lead.

Well, not actually but it’s a similar concept. As presenters we should start with something that allows us to be most comfortable. Move your best stuff up to the top. Start with the stuff you used to put in the middle. You will start more comfortably and the audience will feed off your lead. They feel comfortable.

Try it sometime. either in a formal presentation or a casual conversation. When telling that story that is funny or feeling, try to start with the most important part or the most important line. It will get the attention of your audience and they will eagerly listen for more. Start in the middle!

Military Basics

Posted On: 03-22-2011

Spoke to the military a couple of weeks back. I was the keynote presenter at the Kentucky National Guard Airman/Solider of the Year award.

I was a member of the Kentucky Air National Guard way back when. In fact I was activated for 20 months of consecutive duty so I am classified as a veteran, but I don’t wear the uniform anymore. So it was eye opening to step back into the world of the military and share a message with the women and men who serve our country. Serve is the key word and they understand the meaning of the word. It’s about the basics.

Yes, the military follow procedures. They are committed to the process as well as the outcome but they also understand it’s all about the people. We sometime lose focus that the military is made up of people. People who leave their families because they are committed to a bigger family. People who grow lonely when they wake up in a place far away from the people they love. People who endure hardships to protect ideals and issues to which they are deeply committed. That’s the key word, COMMITTED. They choose to commit to a cause, issue, an ideal, and they stay with it. It takes on a sort of reverence. It’s more than words, it a way of life. They live out their commitment through their actions. It shows in the way they gather, the way they speak, the way they interact. It becomes their procedure.

I showed up to thank them for their commitment and to encourage them to be resilient. Sometimes it’s a challenge to stay committed to the important things …. God, Family, Self. I thought I was there to motivate them. But as often happens when we pay attention, we learn by listening. I was encouraged and empowered to stay resilient in the basics … commitment to God, Family, and Self. They didn’t say it, they showed it. The basics!

The Basics

Posted On: 03-05-2011

I just returned form a speaking engagement in Las Vegas. I shared the ‘I CAN PLAY’ attitude with owners, leaders, and soon to be owners and leaders in the Pizza industry.

To tell the truth, sometimes I think the message is just too simple. BELIEVE IN YOURSELF — TRUST YOURSELF… it’s the first step to success! See what I mean. You just read it and thought “Well of course, who doesn’t know that?”

Evidently a lot of people. They just don’t get the basics. They are looking for something with a little more pop, they want an idea that’s new. Something they haven’t heard of yet. They’ve heard this vision, positive atmosphere, and risk before …. got anything new?

Nope. Just the basics. I talked with individuals who got excited about the basics this week. They heard the message in a different way. They were influenced by the message. They got it…. it was powerful!

Just received an email from a gentleman in Wisconsin. Said he had put his dream away. Decided that the corporate way was the best way. But then he got the message at the Pizza Expo. The basic message. BELIEVE IN YOURSELF…. TRUST YOURSELF …. it’s the first step to success! He got excited. He’s getting uncomfortable. He’s getting his dream out of mothballs. He’s beginning to see himself opening his own pizza shop! He can probably see friends coming through the door, feel the heat of the ovens, smell the garlic and see the joy he creates in his customers.

What changed! He got back to the basics …. vision, positive atmosphere, risk …. the simple things that make an ‘I CAN PLAY’ attitude. The basics that get us to trust and begin living successfully instead of looking for success!

Farmers National Company

Posted On: 10-25-2010

I Can Play presentation with Farmers National Company – Oct 25,2010

TEAMERSHIP – It’s like leadership but with the team in front!

Focus on the Goal!
Take Ownership!
Create a Cooperative Environment!

Things we can bring to the team …. minus, division,addition, or multiply. We want to multiply our team and each member.

Make it #3 — Create a SUCCESS Environment!

LEADERSHIP – When someone feels better about who they are because they were around you!

I CAN PLAY attitude

1. VISION

Make it real.

Live it each day.

Share it with others.

2. POSITIVE ATMOSPHERE

Positive self-talk.

Positive people/places.

Focus on results.

3. RISK

Face the negatives.

Expand boundaries.

Practice the difficult.