Simple Communication

Spent a full day with teachers working on the I CAN PLAY attitude, Teamership, Leadership, and Influence.  I have decided it all comes down to communication.  Not just talking but the total communication process.

There are 3 keys to communication – Engage, get their attention – Influence, share the important facts – Add Value, help them understand the benefit to them.

Now that sounds simple.  You might say communication is just talking, often about things that are not terribly important and that others do not want to hear.  Exactly, so let’s adjust our thinking and make communication exciting.  Become intentional in your communication, specifically the conversations you share with others.  It might be difficult to totally transform so pick your spots.

Perhaps  try it with your husband, wife, son or daughter.  Or someone you work with.  Here’s the routine.  Engage someone by making sure you have their attention.  How?  On the television screen I used to say this simple phrase ..”WATCH THIS!” and then pause.  It’s attention getting.  The words attract attention but the pause, the silence, it captures them.  It’s engaging.

Once engage, you have their attention, tell them the important information that they need to know and why they need to know it.  Be specific and to the point, brief, in your sharing.  Add energy and excitement.  Influence them with the information and the process of receiving the information.  Become an expert for the moment,  passing along the information in a way that they enjoy listening.

You might think that what you have to share is not important.  Then I suggest you just keep quite until you have something to say.  Or perhaps go discover some new excitement in your life or ways to help others understand they can be better than they think they can be!

Finally, let them know how the information can benefit them.  Add value to their lives!   Display how listening to you can help them grow, understand, learn, and be better than they were before they encountered you.  Make it an enjoyable experience listening to you.  Be sure that what you say, and how you say it, adds values to them.

You might say ….”All I want to do is share some information with them.  Gary, you’re trying to make it some grand event.”

That’s exactly what I am trying to do.  And so can you.  Try it!  It will help in your leadership development.

Questions shared with Precious Blood

Just returned from a Mission with Precious Blood Parish in Owensboro, KY.  I met and prayed with some wonderful people who are letting their Light shine in the Parish and beyond!

We discussed a couple of communication processes using questions … asking others, but more importantly asking ourselves.  Here are some of the questions and ideas we explored during the three day Mission.

Who am I? This digs to our very core.  Who am I?  What a question! But instead of just ignoring the question start writing down answers.  Explore yourself, the deeper you explore the more you will understand.  And if you don’t like some of the answers…adjust!

What do I believe? If you were required to stand on a roof top and shout out what you believe , for everyone to hear–What would you say?  Similar to what does your sign say or what is your message.  What do you believe?

What are my values? This one is similar to what do I believe but with a twist.  What values to you adhere to.  Truth, is that important?  Honesty, commitment, service to others… what values drive you to be who you are.  Write them down so you know who you are and what you are committed to.

What are my talents? This a little easier but still difficult to address.  The best way to discover talents is to use your talents.   List your talents  — it helps define who you are.

What am I doing with my talents? Do I give my talents away, that is, do I use them.  The only way they come alive is to put them to action.  If you are an artist but haven’t put a brush on a canvas, you aren’t using your talents.  If you are a great communicator but don’t greet people, or look them in the eye when you speak, you aren’t doing much with your talent. Use you talents, all of them, use them often, and you will discover there’s more in there.  Keep looking!

What holds me back? Let’s face it you are a unique individual, unique talents, skills but sometimes things hold you back from being the best you can be.  Explore what holds you back.  Name it, tame it and move forward … get past the obstacle.  You first have to identify what holds you back.

Questions are wonderful tools to use for growth.  Grow yourself, grow your family, your church, and your workplace.

Here is the Gary Montgomery process when using questions with others … Q-L-C.

Of course the Q stand for quetions.  Open conversation with others with questions about them.

The L stands for Listen and for Learn. And learning about others is most important.  Listening is the process we use to Learn about others.  Pay close attention about them because the more we learn about others, the deeper we can go in building a relationship.

The C stands for Contribute.  Once we learn what individuals like and dis-like we can Contribute to them and help them grow by feeling better about themselves.  When they feel better about who they are, because they were around and with us, well that’s leadership.  They will want to be around you, listen to you and be influenced by you more and more because you help them feel better about who they are.  That’s the process … how to use questions to help others grow.

At the three-day Mission we focused on using the  questions in our life to grow, to discover the Light, to become the Light, and then to give the Light of Christ away.

Be specific and go deep when questioning yourself.  You can take it because you want to be the best you can be.

Be gentle when using the question technique with others.  They don’t yet know how good they can be.  They need you to guide them.

The friendly people at Precious Blood were an inspiration for me to continue questioning and working to grow and share the Light!  Thanks for the kindness and hospitality!

Hello 2010

I’ve just emerged into 2010.  Too cold to get out.  I guess that might be a resolution; learn to deal with the cold!

Gearing up for some January events.  I have a Confirmation retreat coming up January 18 with St. Thomas More and St. Nicholas Schools.  It’s always a blessing to work with 8th graders as they prepare to take a step in their faith life.

January 21st I will share the I CAN PLAY formula with the North East Louisville Business Association.  The 22nd and 23rd is a parish council staff retreat with St. Thomas in Bardstown Kentucky and another 8th grade Confirmation retreat on January 30th with St. Bernadette.

I want to share some resolutions and some ideas on making them come true but that will have to wait.  Going to check out another football Bowl game.  Only a few left.

Hope the new year is off to a great start!

Retreat

Just back from a retreat with St. Micheal men in Louisville Kentucky.  The weekend event was an opportunity to explore Christian Leadership with a group of men committed to their church, their families and their careers.

As we explored the different qualities of leadership in each area of our lives we began to identiy the same qualities in each area.   It didn’t take long for them to conclude that it’s what we bring to each area of life that will decide the success we will enjoy in each area.  It’s what we bring to our church, our relationships and what we bring to our careers.

Finally we decided that we need to bring hope to those people and places in our lives … and it starts with us.

Leaders build hope internally then share it wherever they travel.